Wyverns in the Mountains

My weapon’s on the ready though my armor’s low on skills
My Felyne’s all excited – we wanna get a lot of kills
We got to Area 1, and there’s a Tigrex on the loose
I don’t want to fight the Tigrex, I just want some Thunderbug Juice!

My Felyne started slashing but I ran up to Area 2
Climbed the vine and grabbed some Ivy, and drank some Hot Drink too
I checked the Area 3 but then the Khezu’s in the cave
I wanna get Blue Mushrooms there but the Khezu won’t behave

I left the Khezu there and went directly to Area 4
I got myself some Honey and a piece of Iron Ore
I talked to Veggie Elder but his items weren’t superb
But then I gave him Garbage and he gave me Mountain Herb!

My Great Sword slashed the Giapreys in Area 5 so easily
But Area 6 was such a shock when the Kirin jumped right at me
The beast hopped frantically here and there and I was in so much pain
I swear that silver unicorn is mentally insane!

I managed to find my way to Area 7 with a run
But Kushala Daora was waiting there, it wasn’t so much fun
To make it worse my Felyne decided to start his gathering
While there I was with poor attempt to hack at Daora’s wing

I managed to avoid the icy winds that Daora threw
But I just can’t get near enough no matter what I do
With not a single slash, I don’t think I can defeat
And I remembered that I’m only here for some Raw Meat

I left the Elder Dragon and decided to go to Area 8
And there they were, the Popos, which were cute but doomed by fate
I killed them, got some Raw Meat, and some Popo Tongues as well
While my Felyne stood by waiting, he’s finished gathering, I can tell

I’ve farmed enough Raw Meat and it’s time to go back to base
But then Kushala Daora came in an icy breezy haze
I ran to the other side but the Tigrex came charging in
I blocked him with my Great Sword but I was stunned by some blue lightning

I couldn’t tell from where it came — was it Kirin or was it Khezu?
For in fact, both of them were there, even the Giadrome too
To save myself from the five of them, I crawled into the hole
And from there I climbed to the top, the place where there’s a pole

I checked below to see if maybe some of them have died
Those crazy monsters could kill each other since the area wasn’t wide
But to my surprise I saw that they were having some conference
And then I realized that this wasn’t making that much sense

For one thing, there wasn’t such a quest where five of them were in
And for goodness’ sake, I only planned on gathering
And when I started to use Farcaster, I thought this dream has got to stop
And with a shriek of the alarm clock, I finally woke up

*Inspired by the game Monster Hunter Portable 2ndG.